Wednesday, September 23, 2009

养儿百岁,长忧九十九

经过了四天的相聚,丫头又回学院去了。虽然她时常都有回来,每次离开家时我总是那么的心焦!我也不清楚别人的妈妈是不是也是像我一样放不下!人说:三岁定八十,这种会心焦的感觉好像是由生俱来的。小时候,每次随父母回乡后就不愿意再跟他们回去学校,心会很焦啊!
我还算好了,虽然心有不舍,总没有哭哭啼啼的。我那老友的儿女都出国留学去了,她告诉我:每当经过子女们空荡荡的房间时就会掉眼泪!还有,每回子女回国度假,当假期结束后又要飞走时,她又得哭哭啼啼一次,搞到子女们都不让她去送机!Haiz,真是养儿百岁,长忧九十九,不是吗?

69 comments:

人间凡人 said...

ypy,

现在通讯和交通都这么发达,要听声音一通电话就可解决,要见面,也有3G电话或免费的skype网上video conferencing。再不然就驾车过去好了。那像以前的父母般可怜。

Yi Pian Yun said...

凡人先生,
我们每天都有通过skype和MSN联络,但是那种心焦的感觉还是有的,莫名其妙啊!(通常是第一天)

走过岁月 said...

老师,天下父母心,我能理解你的心情,有时必须要放下。

雅湘 said...

父母对儿女的心,一辈子都不可能改变。

小菲 said...

唉,天下的爸爸妈妈都是一样的。

cpy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ting said...

每一位父母,都有一颗吝啬的心。
他们惟一不吝啬的,是对孩子的爱。

Ting said...

随着网络的出现,世界似乎已变得越来越小了。

Yi Pian Yun said...

走过岁月, 雅湘,小菲,
人人都说:最可怜是天下父母心。你看明福的母亲,那种抱着儿子的相片上法庭的情景,让我看了都老泪纵横!
Ting,
活到这把年龄,还有什么放不下?我可以告诉你:唯一让我放不下的就是丫头了!
对面家的安蒂问我:我们(父母亲)这么挂虑他们(儿女),你说他们会挂虑我们吗?” Ting,你说呢?

Ting said...

父母现在怎样,子女将来也大概是怎样。

cpy said...

改变能改变的,接受不能改变的。

cpy said...

心有不舍是因为感情深厚。

飞燕 said...

没有哪个人是生活在一无挂虑中。

Yi Pian Yun said...

cp,飞燕,

父母亲对于儿女的挂虑,“千肠挂肚”就是最佳的形容词吧!

芯蒂 said...

母亲对儿女的挂虑,从来没有中断过。

Jack2 said...

有人说,一个母亲是应当为着自己的儿女挂虑的,如果不挂虑就是犯罪。

ypy,你怎么说?

有情 said...

儿女会挂虑我们吗?
哈哈,慢慢等咯!

Yi Pian Yun said...

有情,
真巧,我也是那样回答我的邻居!
芯蒂,
都说咯,养儿百岁,长忧九十九。记得陈广才前部长说过:他虽然已几十岁了,他那八十高龄的母亲还会牵挂着他,因此他每到一处都要向老母报告他的行踪,好孝顺噢!

Ting said...

陈广才牵涉及125亿令吉巴生港口自由区醜闻?

Jessie said...

我孩子现在都在身边,还没真正体会到个中滋味。有时会跟朋友抱怨说,恨不得他们快快长大到外边生活,我就“无眼屎,干净盲”。我就知道只是嘴巴硬,那会这么潇洒。

Yi Pian Yun said...

Jessie,
到时你就不这般潇洒咯!你做的muffin又让我流口水了!
走过岁月,人间凡人,Jessie以及和我有生意来往的网友,
我人老,眼花,耳不灵,再加上善忘,时常丢三掉四,因此不敢出门乱闯,我还是在自家说话比较方便,从今起一却的留言都在此贴上以策安全,谢谢你们的支持!

Jessie said...

cool down,认真想一想,拿别人的错误来惩罚自己,是不是很不值得呢?不喜欢听的,别听;不喜欢看的,别看。。。当他透明,我就是这样,懒得理别人怎么说。

你一定要来我家哦,少了你,我家冷清清的,呜呜。。。好凄凉啊!不呆在家,要我整天往外跑串门子,到时我家老爷下禁足令就糟糕了!何况来我家肯定不会遇到你不想见到的人,大门随时开着,等着你的大驾光临咯。。。

小菲 said...

拿别人的错误来惩罚自己,
这等于太给别人面子啦!

Yi Pian Yun said...

Jessie,小菲,
不是punish自己啊,而是人老了受不了那种待遇,月老越怕死呀!还是乖乖在家比较安全咩!

有情 said...

贵人善忘。。。。

Loo said...

以我亲身的体验,人都是善忘的!

霓芸 said...

不喜欢听,就别听。
不喜欢看,就别看。
很正常嘛。。。

Yi Pian Yun said...

有情,Loo,
不知还有谁比我更善忘?我自己认为善忘的人最笨。我也做点直销(只是蝇头小利),曾有人order了货又后悔而不买,我只好自己吞进去,可是过了不久当那人在要order时,我又忘了,前后给她耍过几次都不记得,你说我笨不笨?
霓芸,
就是因为不想看和听所不该看和听的才不敢乱串门子呀!还是在家里比较安全,管他外面的吵和乱(像麻化)

Huilu said...

在家里比较安全,讲话也不怕别人听到,不是吗?

cpy said...

都说了,人都是善忘的。只要角色稍微一转换,随时都会忘了自己先前的经历。

Yi Pian Yun said...

Huilu,
对呀,在自己家里要大就大,要小就小,没人理你。去到人家的家,步步为营,一不小心,就会大难临头般,自己拿自己来衰罢了,haiz!
善忘的人要做好许多防患le,比如我时常掉门锁以致不能入门,只好东放一串,西放一串以防万一!

Yi Pian Yun said...

cpy,
人虽善忘,有些事情是终生难忘的啊!比如说被人欺负,被人看轻,被人暗算,被人冤枉的事会那么容易忘怀?骗人的!

Loo said...

ypy, 我们都很关心你。

加油吧!

Huilu said...

对,有些事情对于某些人来说,是很容易忘记的。但是,还有一些事情,对于另一些人来说,可能是终身难忘的咯!

ckwi said...

被人欺负,被人看轻,被人暗算,被人冤枉?
这种滋味肯定不好受呀!
口吃黄连,有苦说不出。。。

飞燕 said...

被人冤枉,是消业障,应存感恩之心。
古人说:有则改之,无则嘉勉。

Yi Pian Yun said...

ckwi,飞燕,
小时家贫被人看轻,也被人欺负,到后来的被人暗算和冤枉,这些都是消业障?那我该感恩咯。这些经验都让我懂得怎样去保护自己!

琪微 said...

许多事情总是在经历过以后才会懂得如何保护自己。傻过了,才会懂得适时的坚持与放弃。

Jack2 said...

有人说,其实被人看轻的主要不在于别人,而是你自己。你说呢?

Ting said...

被人看轻了,就当那是一阵风吧!吹过了就吹过了,我们依然可以快乐地做自己想做的事,不需要向任何他人证明自己。

Ching said...

Quote:

#生活在感恩的世界#

感激傷害你的人﹐因為他磨煉了你的心志
感激欺騙你的人﹐因為他增進了你的見識
感激鞭打你的人﹐因為他消除了你的業障
感激遺棄你的人﹐因為他教導了你應自立
感激絆倒你的人﹐因為他強化了你的能力
感激斥責你的人﹐因為他助長了你的定慧

Credits to original source

Yi Pian Yun said...

Jack2,
我不敢出门就是怕被人拿来衰,你怎么也拿我来衰?你说被人看轻在于自己?那是什么伟伦?如果说因为穷困和地位低而被人看轻,请问是不是自己的错?那些看轻人的衰货只是命水比人家好罢了,有什么gilek?
Ting,
看不起我的人,我更看不起他,因此我发奋要做得比他好!
Ching,
说得没错,我该感激那些伤害过我的人,才磨练了今天的我!

Ting said...

忘却那些伤害吧!
忘记那些仇恨吧!
生命虽然短暂,爱却可以永恒。

Jack2 said...

你相信命水吗?你相信命运吗?

Yi Pian Yun said...

jack2,
当不能解释一件事时,就只好怪命水了。你能解释为何有人会被诞生在富裕的家,有人被诞生在穷苦的家?因为富裕,因此有机会受更好的教育,status也相续提高,这不是命水/命运又是什么?

Yi Pian Yun said...

Ting,
忘却。。。。。忘却。。。。。早都忘却了,只是那留下的疤痕还会撩起伤痛!

有情 said...

我们应该面对过去的伤痛,伤痛代表永远吗?

望阳 said...

当你经历过伤痛之后,命运一定会以另外一种方式赐你幸福的。Hopefully......

Ching said...

Maybe I have posted this before. If so, sorry about that.

****************

Source: Internet Compiled by : Sanaz M

A Beautiful Life

Here Are Some Tips That May Bring You A Beautiful Life!

1.Take a 10-30 minute walk every day, and while you walk, smile.
2.Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
3.When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement,
“My purpose is to … today.”
4.Live with the 3 E’s … Energy, Enthusiasm, Empathy and 3 F’s … Faith, Family, Friends.
5.Spend more time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of six.
6.Dream more while you are awake.
7.Try to make at least 3 people smile each day.
8.Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn, pass all your tests. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a life time.
9.Smile and laugh more. It will keep the energy vampires away.
10.Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.
11.Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
12.Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
13.You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagreements.
14.Make peace with your past, so it won’t mess up the present.
15.Don’t compare your life with others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
16.Burn the candles, use the nice sheets. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
17.No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
18.Forgive everyone for everything.
19.What other people think of you is none of your business.
20.Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
21.However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
22.Your job wouldn’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
23.Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
24.The best is yet to come.
25.No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
26.Do the right thing!
27.Call your family often.
28.Each night before you got to bed, complete the following statements:
“I am thankful for ….” “Today I accomplished ….”
29.Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.
30.Enjoy the ride. Remember this not Disney World and you certainly don’t want a fast pass. Make the most of it and enjoy the ride.

P/s; I have to honestly say that I can’t agree with all the tips. But I do practice some of them. lol

Ching said...

大姐, 我觉得你活的很多姿多彩啊,也很会享受人生嘛。
只要我们活的有意义,充实和快乐,不一定要有富裕的背景,很高深的教育吧?当然富裕有富裕的好处,但我想未必每个富裕的人都会快乐,他们应该也有他们的烦恼。比如钱太多了,要如何去用,如何保持现状,或者去找更多的钱。我们反而乐的轻松,live within our means, 也不用去想要怎样去钱生钱啦。知足常乐。
p/s; 以上只是个人意见,no offence to anybody.

Source: Internet email

Ten Commandments for Those Over Fifty \Years Old*

* 1 *. Focus on enjoying people, not on indulging in or accumulating material things. ,.

*2*. Plan to spend whatever you have saved.
You deserve to enjoy it and the few healthy years you have left. Travel if you can afford it. Don't leave anything for your children or loved ones to quarrel about. By leaving anything, you may even cause more trouble when you are gone.

*3*. Live in the here and now. not in the yesterdays and tomorrows. It is only today that you can handle. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow may not even happen.

*4! *. Enjoy your grandchildren (if blessed with any) but don't be their full time baby sitter. You have no moral obligation to take care of them. Don't have any guilt about refusing to baby sit anyone's kids. including your own grandkids. Your parental obligation is to your children. After you have raised them into responsible adults, your duties of child-rearing babysitting are finished. Let your children raise their own off-springs.

*5*. Accept physical weakness, sickness and other physical pains. It is a part of the aging process. Enjoy whatever your health can allow.

*6*. Enjoy what you are and what you have right nO\v. Stop working hard for what you do not have. If you don't have them. it's probably too late.

*7*. Enjoy your life with your spouse. children. grandchildren and friends.
People. who truly love you. love you for yourself. not for what you have.
Anyone who loves you for what you have will just give you misery.

*8*. Forgive and accept forgiveness. Forgive yourself and others. Enjoy peace of mind and peace of soul.

*9*. Befriend death. It's a natural part of the life cycle. Don't be afraid of it.
Death is the begilming of a new and better life. So. prepare yourself not for death but for a new life ,vith the Almighty.

* 10*. Be at peace with your Creator. For... He is all you have after you leave
this life. .............

Jack2 said...

This shows why "you" are important.

If you aren't happy with yourself, then you can't make anyone else happy.

Kenneth said...

~~~ Life Is Wonderful ~~~

It takes a crane to build a crane
It takes two floors to make a story
It takes an egg to make a hen
It takes a hen to make an egg
There is no end to what I'm saying

It takes a thought to make a word
And it takes some words to make an action
It takes some work to make it work
It takes some good to make it hurt
It takes some bad for satisfaction

La la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Al la la la la

It takes a night to make it dawn
And it takes a day to make you yawn brother
And it takes some old to make you young
It takes some cold to know the sun
It takes the one to have the other

And it takes no time to fall in love
But it takes you years to know what love is
It takes some fears to make you trust
It takes those tears to make it rust
It takes the dust to have it polished

Ha la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is so full of
Ah la la la la la la life is so rough
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is our love
Ah la la la la la

It takes some silence to make sound
It takes a loss before you found it
And it takes a road to go nowhere
It takes a toll to make you care
It takes a hole to make a mountain

Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life goes full circle
Ha la la la la la life is wonderful
Ha la la la la la life is meaningful
Ha la la la la la life is wonderful
Ha la la la la la life it is...so... wonderful
It is so meaningful
It is so wonderful
It is meaningful
It is wonderful
It is meaningful
It goes full circle
Wonderful
Meaningful
Full circle
Wonderful

Gemini said...

Kenneth,

Thanks for the posting. I love this song very much. Very meaningful, beautiful and wonderful. If I am not wrong, it's sung by Jason Mraz.

Yi Pian Yun said...

望样,
谢谢鼓励,有时我也觉得伤痛过后,得到的是另一种“幸福”,不知是不是巧合。
Ching,
yes , u posted the " A beautiful Life " before. 我忘了是Kenneth还是有情说过喜欢第六项: Dream more while you are awake,我也是最喜欢它,因此每天都在寻梦,哈哈!你post的Ten commandments妙极了,你说我们至少有跟随五项吗?
Kenneth,
Thanks 4 de meaningful and beautiful song u posted。我猜你和 Gemini是受英文教育的?你们会唱那么多英文老歌,我却只会唱华语老歌。
Anyway,谢谢你们的支持!

琪微 said...

幸福是:
一种感觉,
一种经历,
一种体验,
一个过程。

琪微 said...

唱华语老歌?
往事只能回味咯,哈哈!

望阳 said...

老歌新唱??

Yi Pian Yun said...

琪薇,望阳,
老歌当然老唱啦。我又换了唱歌老师咯。我天生急性子,喜爱唱快的,那天要选唱“红花襟上插”,老师说不可以唱那么快的,结果唱“绿岛小夜曲”。有一首白光的“花落。。。水流。。。。,春去无踪。。。。。”慢到我 beh tahan,哈哈!

Loo said...

白光的歌,我也很喜欢。

小菲 said...

歌要唱得好就一定得下点工夫咯!

Gemini said...

歌声能给家庭带来欢乐的气氛。
ypy, 加油!

Ting said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
cpy said...

可是有些人唱起歌来东一腔,西一调,实在不好听,哈哈。

Yi Pian Yun said...

Loo,
原来你是白光迷,我不大爱唱她的歌,太慢了。
小菲,
唱歌看似容易,其实不容易,我断断续续也学了两,三年还是不精。
gemini,
老伴生前是二毛子,不懂得欣赏,为了迁就他,我从来不在他面前唱,丫头呢,她让特纳为那老歌恐怖极了,因此都是等他们不在时才来自我陶醉一番,哈哈!
cpy
只要敢唱,没人理你唱得东腔西调,你没见过那些老男人,老女人在宴会时唱到走调咩?人家才难得理他们!

cpy said...

解决唱歌不走调的方法只有一个。那就是以后再也不唱咯,哈哈 。。。

cpy said...

要唱好一首歌,真的不是一件容易的事情。

Yi Pian Yun said...

cpy,
从你的语气,好像是Jack的化身?如果是,对不起,我不要再惹你,请便!

cpy said...

让我们回到当初陌生的距离,
你不要惹我,我也不来惹你。
So long, farewell. Bye bye.....

Yi Pian Yun said...

对,回到本来就是陌生的距离,虚无缥缈的网络世界,goo的bye。